What if the same person leaves you energized and drained?

Interesting situation right?  Sometimes you talk to them and feel elated, sometimes you talk to them and feel really low. Pay attention to what types of conversation elicit each response. Specifically, try to figure out if your mood starts depending on how pleased they are with you. 

You can try and get more specific about why this person had such an inordinate amount of influence in your energy and well being: Usually when this happens, we are talking about someone who has a measure of power over you, like a mentor or supervisor. Alternatively (or at the same time), we are talking about someone with poor boundaries, who takes a lot of your time.

People who truly energize you don’t make you feel terrible. Even in disagreement, even if they doubt your course of action, even if they are discussing a problem. They don’t try to manipulate you and turn really nice when they succeed. They use effective communication, and don’t use blame or guilt trips or coercion. The way to counteract interactions like these is to have more low stakes interactions that leave you energized, with your co-workers, lab next door, vendors, people you share equipment with, admin personnel, whomever you can find that keeps you grounded. The goal is to be able to separate your mood and sense of well being from the person, so that you can actually function and perform.